Giant ball sacks.

So!!!!! I saw Adebisi Shank at the weekend for the first time. Alan told me about them a while back and i haven’t stopped listening to them since. Seeing them live though……fuck me. Id say they are one of the best bands i’ve seen live in the last few years. Totally blown away. If you have any sort of soul go listen to this band but above all….get yourself to one of their shows before all the cunts in Shoreditch start talking about them.

www.myspace.com/adebisishank

Also i came across Frontier(s) over the weekend who are also awesome. I was a huge Elliot fan and this is Chris the singers new band. They also fucking rule.

http://www.myspace.com/frontiersband

In another news, life sucks at home.

Oliver

Scotland

Today I am hungover in Aberdeen and feel like I’m going to die. It’s the fault of a man called Steven Sandilands, who is a promoter in Glasgow, he puts on little gigs like Foo FIghters and Led Zeppelin, and when he’s not busy doing that he’s smashing Truant to bits with whisky. It’s now 5pm, and I think I’m going to go throw up backstage. Wicked.

laters
Roo X

p.s. Rolo Tomassi are sweet, I’m on tour with them at the moment, check them out innit.

Wanna get Tattooed if you are in Toronto…go see Glennie!

While in Toronto Jaye Bats introduced me to the awesome Glennie who tattoos out of New Tribe Tattoo on Queen street. Its right by Much Music and its a sweet shop. She is totally rad and likes Patsy Cline and Dolly Parton. Go see her, buy her beers and get her to tattoo you lots. She is also as big as a small flower.

Thanks Glennie!!!!

Oliver

Everyday a new star is born into the light…

Oh yeah…

The new Ben Stiller film, Tropic somthingorother is pretty shit, you shouldn’t go and see it. There are two properly funny bits, one when Jack Black hurts his arse and one where a kid stabs Ben Stiller in the neck. Both these bits are at the end.

And where oh where is Owen Wilson? It’s not cool to drop your mates when they’re going through a hard time Stiller you piece of shit. I’m glad your film was crap.

Alan.x

Picturehouse

In the Picturehouse again, I had to ask a member of staff to find my laptop because Kenny left it in the staff room for me. They told me they couldn’t give it to me unless I got Ken on the phone. Couldn’t get hold of Ken so it looked like I wasn’t going to get online. Luckily the combination of dirty socks and a poster of a stripper the rest of the guys won for me a strip joint (I don’t go to strip joints, they’re rank) in the front pocket of the laptop case was deemed uncommon enough paraphernalia for me to be able to use it as proof that the laptop was mine.

I’ve just spent about 2 hours on facebook, myspace, ebay, gumtree and hotmail. Buy my guitars off gumtree, a fender mustang and a fender deluxe strat. And get a move on, I’m skint.

Alan.x

Home.

Saw the new Hulk at the weekend. It was fucking shit.

The heineken is way better back at home.

I cant stop sleeping.

Tomorrow i’m gonna play Lego batman.

Oliver

Picturehouse

Yesterday I returned to the closest thing I have to a home, Kenny’s flat. As some of you may know from my past blog entries, this means that in order to use the internet I have to walk down to Greenwich Picturehouse and sit in the bar exploiting the wifi. Ken works at the picturehouse so I don’t look like too much of a dickhead sitting here for hours drinking tea because there’s usually somebody I know working the bar who I can talk to when I start too feel like too much of a reprobate.

Today I am getting over a hangover, after going up to Angel for a couple of pints with Katie, Pete and Jaye I met Ken in London bridge and we went to a party and Jamie’s flat. Jamie is in a band called The King Blues, everybody loves them myspace.com/thekingblues, you know what to do.

I drank some rum and ginger ale and stayed up late with a bunch of people I haven’t seen for ages which was pretty rad and then Ken and myself headed back to Greenwich. The night bus took fucking ages to come and then it was so rammed with people that the fascist driver wouldn’t let anyone else on. There were some pretty chatty Italians at the bus stop which I thought was pretty cool until they turned out to be boons. One of them was an old school punk with a big red mohawk and studs all over his leather jacket. Ken used to live in Italy and when the punk found out he said “You used to live in Italy? So fuck yyyoooooouuuuu”. What a cool dude.

Right, I’m going to watch the new Ben Stiller film, I don’t even know what its called but its free. Thanks Ken.

Alan.x

Airports And Waiting

I fucking hate fucking airports, they make me feel physically sick, the whole horrific fucking pantomime of packing your bags, making sure you’ve remembered everything, loading it into a cab (which, by the way, had a serious loose cannon for a driver and had us all honestly fearing for our lives, wheel spinning round corners, barely missing pedestrians and attracting furious honks for his fellow motorists) and then just various forms of waiting and queuing for things. Having our stuff weighed is always the worst, since we fly as cheaply as possible we always get a luggage allowance equivalent to the weight of three field mice and Feeble has to try and charm the check in girls into finding a way to let us bring around a ton of extra stuff onto the plane without them charging us twenty dollars a kilogram. Somehow his Bambi like eyes and soothing vocal tones always do the trick and we manage to get through, although this time it was definitely a struggle We were at the desk for about twenty minutes weighing bags over and over again and eventually had to open them all up, take out anything heavy we had and put it in separate duty free bags to take on as hand luggage; a monumental ballache. Especially as the queue of passengers, huffing, puffing and sighing at our boonish weight shifting circus was increasing by the minute. I was knackered from our goodbye party the night before and was definitely feeling the pressure of the day as we moved on to the next area to do some waiting in.

Security…. don’t talk to me about god damn security, trying to pick the fastest moving line of morons while some fellow bellows his fucking lungs out about not taking liquids on the plane and waves plastic bags about. Inevitably I always get stuck behind some useless old biddy, having to ferry herself backwards and forwards through the sodding metal detector time and time again because she forgot to take the tin of mints out of her knickers. And what the fuck is the deal with not putting your fucking tray away once your carry on luggage has gone through the x-ray? Thats right mate, you just stand there putting your sodding belt back on, no rush, there’s only a queue of a hundred people behind you. you dumb motherfucker.

And then, the delights of the departure lounge, ten dollars a pint and some disgusting shitty overpriced food to chew on while you sit out the remaining hours until you can queue to start boarding. What a world….

I would write more but I’m going to bed.

Alan.x

The Grotesque

The new video for Grotesque is the featured video on myspace metal.. go check it out, we painted ourselves in black body paint and twatted around like idiots all day a few months ago, and Adam Powell and Robin Fuller made it look cool using expensive stuff people like us aren’t allowed to play with.

www.myspace.com/metal

We’re about the go get our flight back to the UK, last night we got royally spannered with a bunch of friends at the Horseshoe and Sneaky Dee’s, so we’re all hungover which should make the 8 hour flight especially lovely. I’m going to down a load of whisky and painkillers and hope I get the combination just right so I sleep but don’t die. Sweet.

Roo X